Body Language

"When the eyes say one thing and the tongue another, the practiced person relies on the language of the first."

Did you realize that the vast majority of communication actually is done in a nonverbal manner? It is true! Oftentimes, it is what we do not verbally say that expresses so much. Body language is the area of communication that is nonverbal. It consists of evaluating someone's gestures, poses, facial expressions, and even eye movements in order to gain a better understanding of what someone is saying, hiding, or how they feel about something.

Having a basic understanding of body language can go a long way toward helping you understand what others are feeling, as well as helping to keep your own in check while listening to others. Body language is just another helpful way to "read" someone. You have probably been reading people's body language since you were a child, knowing when the adults around you were angry, upset, or relaxed, without them needing to say word.

What Body Language Looks Like

Have you ever seen someone using their hands as they speak? That is body language. Other examples include pointing, rolling your eyes in disgust, playing with your hair, crossing your arms, and even putting your hands on your hips. Each of these displays of body language says something about the person who is doing them, as well as how that person may feel about what she or he is listening to.

As a listener, it is important to be aware of the types of body language you may be displaying. If, for example, you are in a conference or meeting and listening to someone speak and you put your elbow on the desk and lean your head up against your hand, as if you are holding your head up, it may appear that you are bored. If you are sitting in your chair or standing and have your arms folded across your chest, it may appear as though you are closed off or against what you are listening to.

When we listen to someone, there is so much more to it than just the words that come out of the speaker's mouth and go into our ears. A good exercise is to purposely observe this in action. For the next day or so, pay attention to the nonverbal communication that you see taking place around you. Pick up on as much of it as you can and see what it helps you determine about the speaker and what is being said.

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